Freedom From Fear

-Devlyn Steele

Decide that you want it, more than you are afraid of it.

-Bill Cosby

One of our greatest obstacles from living the life we desire is fear. Fear holds us back and doesn't allow us move in the direction of our goals. You would think that our goal would be to eradicate fear from our lives, but this isn't the case.  Fear is a very important part of our survival.  Fear allows the brain to go into emergency mode to react to danger, which is called Fight or Flight response. Without the recognition of fear and understanding how to respond, we wouldn't survive as a species. 

It's important to be able to recognize and understand fear.  There is what I call, "reasonable fear".  If your car is slipping out of control on the road while driving, that is reasonable fear. If you're in any situation where you are in harm's way, fear is reasonable.  However, there's another type of fear -- the fear that we invent and project.  This type of fear isn't the result of the need to actually be fearful.  It is triggered by imagining and anticipating a situation that isn't happening at all, but that which we expect will happen.

The brain doesn't know how to differentiate how to react.  Once you have decided that you are in a fearful situation, the brain decides fight or flight. The normal response is to shut down the thinking part of the brain, the cerebral cortex, and resort to the leopard brain taking over. The leopard brain proceeds to automatic pilot and responds in the best way to protect you. The result is that you don't move forward and retreat from your fears.

Where does the projected fear come from? Imagine you want to go for a job interview, but you fear that you'll be rejected.  This type of thinking is the result of the fearing something that is yet to happen. The worst aspect of living in a projected state of fear is dealing with the emotional effects of something that is yet to happen, today. Feeling the emotional experience today to projected fear reinforces that in fact it is real, and the behavior becomes routed in your thinking.

Projection can work in the form of inventing a situation, or of taking a past experience and making that the precedent for how we react in future situations.  For example the pain and failure of past relationships often get projected on future ones, making us fearful of seeking out new relationships.  In essence, projected fear is living in a prison of experiencing unwarranted pain, and prevents us from creating the lives we really want.  That is why I like the acronym for projected FEAR being, "False Evidence Appearing Real."

In order to gain freedom from the prison of projected fear we can do two things. One, we can learn how to override the projection with a series of simple questions:

Ask yourself the following:  Is what I fear actually happening right now, or am in fear of something that I think will happen?  If what I fear does happen, then what is the real worst thing that can happen? Do I have enough faith and trust in myself, that I can handle and recover from negative events?

And here is the most important question...

By letting the fear stop me, what am I giving up?

The reason why that is such an important question is because success often isn't about the absence of fear, but the ability to move forward regardless of fear. The way we move forward and grow is by making what is ahead of us far more significant and relevant than the projected fear of a negative outcome. Make what you want in your life bigger than the fear that holds back.  Let your desires eat your fears.

The second thing you can do is Fight.  Remember the response is "Fight or flight."  Don't let your projected fear choose Flight as its response, which will move you in the opposite direction of your goals and dreams.

The more you choose to fight against the fear that you invent and project, the smaller the fear becomes and the fight becomes easier. You will gain confidence and over time you will have less fear. Landing a better job, enjoying great relationships, going to school, getting healthy, and living the life you really want are worth fighting for.  Freedom is always worth fighting for.

Freedom from fear... Fight or Flight?