| HOME |
ACHIEVEMENTS
|
INSPIRATIONS
|
PEOPLE
|
BLOGS
|
CHALLENGES
|
SUPPORT GROUPS
|
PROGRAMS
|
COMMITMENTS
|
created by: justme28 I'm 28 years old and I was diagnosied with Bipolar II last Monday. I live at home with my mom and stepdad and my daughter. I am going to college and only have a year left.
The thing is my mom, though I know she loves me dearly, is having a hard time understanding what I am going through. She thinks I'm being lazy when I don't have the will or energy to do anything. She gets mad when I pop off at her, which is something new I use to not do it as bad as I do know. I tell her I am sorry and I didn't mean what I said and she says she understands but I can tell it's really starting to work at her nerves.
They put me on Ambilify along with the Celexa I was already taking for depression. I really hope to see some improvement soon because I am use to being in control of what I am going through and my action but lately I feel like I'm a totally different person and it's very aggravating.
Anyway I just really needed to vent and I hope to hear back from some of yall. I really would like to know that I'm not crazy so to say lol.
Hey, I joined up after I read your post. Sounds like you’re really going through a lot, and it sounds a little familiar. I just got back from college the tenth of May (only two more years to go for me) and I saw a psychiatrist last Monday too. There was a lot on my shoulders, especially my mind, and she diagnosed me with Bipolar Disorder I. Now I have to go through the process of trying to find the right meds and how to deal with something that’s been going on for two years now without ever knowing what was happening. And I’m having a tough time finding a median with my mom, and she’s been a psychiatric nurse for thirty years. My dad retired after twenty-five years working as a mental health worker (how they both meet) and there is an unshakeable feeling they both just have no idea what it’s like, so don’t feel alone there!
It’s probably the most difficult thing for me, having this disease that’s so exhausting, and so volatile that it’s deadly in many different ways. I’ve been suicidal, especially a year ago when I was home and alone by myself in a big house. I cut for the first time right around now last year. Just a few months ago while I was manic my best friend’s girlfriend opened up to me how she broke up with him and we started something. Now I don’t have either of them as friends. It’s lonely. Period. It’s something that’s hard to take in, but we’re a little too unique for anyone to fully understand, even ourselves. I think your mom will never understand, but that’s what family is about, loving without understanding. Nevertheless, it’s painful when you’re in so much pain, so much agony and there’s no one that can relate. But there are people who can relate. They’re just hard to find sometimes.
It’s also a struggle finding an identity. Who are you now that you’re ill? It’s an answer many people take years to find. But have faith you’ll find it. I have faith you’ll find it. I know I can’t understand what you’re going through entirely though we fight the same battles. We fight the same demons too, and when those demons are yourself it’s a tough fight to hold on your own. But I hope to hear from you soon if you’d like. Tell me about some of the other things you’re going through, what you’re studying and what you hope to do. I’m sure it’s difficult with a kid too. I’m also curious if you’re taking any mood stabilizers too. I know you’re taking antidepressants, but sometimes taking those alone can trigger manic and hypomanic episodes. Anyway, keep a strong heart. My week has been bad, not sure about yours, but after days of depression and a mixed episode, I’m feel quite weak. But I am hopeful. I hope that you are too. In the end, that is the important thing.
View Full Thread (0)
Comment (0)
