It's clear as mud....

So, I ask myself, "Self, why are you working so hard at creating happiness, when true joy is just a phone call away?"

I've been taking my daily walks. Missed a couple over Christmas, but took a nice long one yesterday. I'm amazed at how revitalized I am and better yet, how clear I think when I am climbing the hill back to my home. (Extending BIG TIME Gratitude to Wordbird for the suggestion, once again).  

I am in the process of clearing out clutter. This- this 'ring' only symbolizes ownership to Flakey. Nothing has changed, except my clarity on it. Last night, I saw a couple of new things that weren't at his house before. Red flag. "She" has been there. It makes sense to me now why he was in such a hurry to leave on Christmas Day to get home by 7pm. I feel foolish.

Now, as Coach says, is the time to take charge and make decisions. My life is my decision. Do I want to continue to pretend that all is swell in fantasyland? Do I want to continue to create a happy snappy life? Do I really HONESTLY want to wake up with a man that "hates mornings" and won't even mutter a 'Good Morning' to me, but instead grunts around like life is such a chore?

Or - should I make the phone call to someone that I KNOW is a better choice for me? Someone that, just speaking to him brings laughter to my soul. Someone I feel so connected to, can talk to for hours and not realize the time has passed so quickly.

Oh, come on, Jane - WAKE UP. (oh, I am awake). YOU know what the answer is to this silly question. You ARE smarter than a 5th Grader. YOU KNOW. Stop lying to yourself, and get on with it.

YOUR life is YOUR decision. Choose to live it!

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Tags: choices, decisions, Honesty