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Birth Date: Sun, Mar 13 1966

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Want to lose 60 pounds.

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Want to stop fighting and yelling at my family.

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How do I approach my son?

My son is 12 yrs old and has adhd with a little bit delay but he is not aggressive..about a month ago he has been telling me the a boy in his class was bothering him I told him to go to the teacher then his counsle..then he did not say anymore about the subject I asked him the teacher told him to ignore him.. then last week I was notivied that he had a fight with the same boy..he told me that he kept calling him names and embarrasing him that he ignored but could not take it anymore and took a swing at him after he punched him first..this boy is what I call a BULLY.. i called the principle and she said that she knew that it was not my son's doing.. they wrote up a report on the boy.. his father and I have always said that never initiate a fight but do defend yourself.. he knows that violence does not slolve anything but being hurt... Now I do not know what to say to him so that he does not become aggressive..I am scared that this situation might ruin all the years of training and educating him to become a good person.. this boy has shown him how to be violent and aggressive... can anyone give me some advice on how to start a conversation so that he won't be intimidated but not aggresive neither..to stand up for him self when needed...

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samfeegan: 2010-11-02

says:

I dont want to downplay the role of a strong mother figure in a family but as a guy I ALWAYS did and still do relate much easier to my father.

Perhaps you could talk with your husband and decide what you two would like to say to your son regarding his fight and have dad initiate the conversation while you are not immediately around. Shortly into the conversation when dad has your son talking and comfortable, nonchelantly enter the room and have your husband kind of introduce you into the conversation as if its no big deal to ease any fears your son may have about talking with you.

One thing I always respected of my father was when we had a heart to heart for this kind of scenario, he treated me as equal and almost as a friend and I was much more able to immediately open up.

Good Luck :)

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How do I approach my son?

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