Well, we do live in the 'rust belt' state.

I am pulling out of the last MS flare and feeling pretty good.  My only complaint is not enough hours in the day, and maybe sometimes not enough energy even if I do have the time.

Managing MS can be a tricky balancing act.  My mother always told me, " Kickapoo, your eyes are bigger than your stomach!" 

That is so true.  I bite off huge chunks of life with zest, passion, and all the best intentions.  Then I am stuck with the most amazing collection of stuff!!! Thousands of dollars worth of glass, wool (for spinning)

yarn,...weaving looms, enough knitting needles  to keep all of Alaska warm!...Ah well. Balance.  Don't eat too much, don't buy too much, don't love too much, don't walk without thinking delberately about where my feet are,  Balance.

Yesterday was an exercise in conspicuous  consumption.  The restaurant my daughter picked was a very fancy fondue place called "The Melting Pot"  I doubt they will be around long.  The bill came to $400.00

and I just felt so sorry for my daughters.  I offered to pay 1/3, but they wouldn't let me.

I am honored by their generousity, but all of us are having trouble makeing mortgage payments, buying groceries and filling our tanks. 

I asked Jon what is involved in bankruptcy.  I am trying to be supportive without cutting off.....his dignity.

Now, I am visuallizing my glass business taking off, and the house being clean, swept, mopped, dusted, and organized. 

I have to, actually, because my niece is having her shower here in a month.

Maybe I can hire a student to help out!

As far as Mother's day; it is a lovely sentiment: a lot like Christmas.  It is just as likely to hurt you to your deepest core, to sadden you, to make you lonely or grieve as it is to give gladness, joy and thankfulness.

We all live with regrets; perhaps how we parented, or were not always able to parent, to have hurt our child without ever knowing it, or dwell on how our parents hurt us; in short, to be human. 

Mother's Day is a great day for Forgiveness.

This is the lesson God is teaching me lately.

I watched a documentary film the other day called "Forgiving Mengela" about one of the twins who were used by him in his ghastly experiments on them at Auschwich-- I know I spelled that wrong, but bare with me. 

Can you imagine having the sheer strength and courage to be motivated to make such an action?  And then to be reviled by many other Jews who said she had absolutely no right to forgive him (on behalf of the 6 million Jews who died there)...

I am of Dutch extraction, and although we can be a stubborn and contentious lot, I am very proud of the part my ancestors played in WW II.  Anne Frank was Dutch.

I do go on!  Feels good to write to share the daily viscissitudes of life.  Oh alright, dagnabbit!  I can feel and hear all you writers groan over all my misspellings.  My brother mocks me constantly, so I stopped e-mailing him, and now I just call.  SO!

New resolution: from now on I write my blog with my dictionary next to me.  I might even get the thesaurus!

HA!  Reminds me of my son's wacky humour.

At five he said to me, "Mommy, when I grow up, I want to be a thesaurus!"  God Bless His Soul.  Too bad he never did get to grow up.  But he was around yesterday too.

Love all you;

Please write back when you have the time or inclination.

Cardinarla

(Carla) 

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Tags: mother's day, forgiveness