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Can Celebrating be Harmful? by DH
I had a great job interview yesterday for a very high level job. In spite of my low self-esteem rattling off self-defeating thoughts for the days leading up to my interview, it went so well that I wanted to celebrate when I got home.
All my husband and I could think to do was to go to the pub and drink with some friends. And drink we did. Today, instead of jumping out of bed full of energy and confidence to keep sending out applications for other big jobs - I slept in late, nursed a hangover all day, and feel like a loser for wasting yet another day and for continuing to live in an area that offers no local, healthy, outlets for celebration.
Lesson I learned from this:
1. I AM capable of being taking seriously for senior level jobs (after being laid off last year, I lost all confidence).
2. I need to move toward things that are helpful to me (ie. I could have celebrated by going to a show in London, or dining out at a nice restaurant rather than getting drunk at a pub!) - and move away from things that are hurtful to me (pubs, some of the people in my life, negative thinking).
3. I have to say to myself "you just learned an important lesson. You are not a "loser" just because you made one bad decision. Move forward and forgive the past."
I'm way too hard on myself - that is for sure.
comments
You are a good learner and that counts
Congratulations on your interview!
Congratulations on discovering and thank you for sharing your lessons with all of us
Congratulations on your Interview!
And congratulations also on two things you learned yesterday.
The most important thing you learned was NOT to beat up on yourself. It is one of the most important lessons in Tools.
I don't know if you have gotten to it yet, but another thing Tools teaches is that if you have made a mistake to try to figure out what you could have done better. You listed two things you could have done to celebrate your interview.
I've had the experience of being laid off. I've had the experience of having a wonderful job and being around while we dismantled one of the best places to work I've ever come across. Those are not good experiences.
It is said that what doesn't kill you will make you stronger. When you come out the other end of this experience, you will realize it is true.
Starling
*hug*
I think over time you will see what you don't want anymore and what is helpful. You will realize what you want more of in your life and what you don't want. Then you can concentrate on what you want, as it isn't very helpful to concentrate on the things you don't want. *grin*
Congratulations
I'm so glad you got the job! And the binge drinking, well I would too, and regret it too. At least your friends got to celebrate together.