90 days. Some have been good days. Some have been difficult days. And some have been great days! I have gone from not liking myself very much, to liking myself and I am working on loving myself. I have gone from letting my lips flap violently towards everyone and everything to being able to stay calm and not get angry because I have become overwhelmed by a situation. I have learned to be grateful for all the different blessings in my life.
And that moment when the hammer hits the nail, right when that happens, not before or after but right at that moment, I am learning to be self aware and responsible. That in itself is huge. For one it stops me from sending myself into a negative spiral and having to climb back out of that hole. It keeps me more balanced throughout my day, and it gives me an opportunity to think clearly the whole day.
Depression strikes much less and I can minimize its effects, but still experience it; I know inside that just because I feel bad, or sad or cranky or edgy that I can still make my decisions based on who I am, my personal laws, my character and not how I feel at that moment.
Ive gained perspective. I have learned to look at the big picture, which means staying consistent and putting in the work each day. Perspective means keep an eye on you overall goals and not to sink into reaction if that goal seems to be slipping away in the short moments of the day. Be consistent with loving yourself and those around you and follow through!
I have gained humility. This is not an easy process and you will have setbacks, some which ache like a rotten tooth. But I have hope and believe in myself and my decisions to overcome.
A lot of work ahead. Everyday brings new challenges and unforseen events. Be bold and do not fear. Capture your heart and I will capture mine and use this as a source of energy and power to make tomorrow a better day.
Thanks Tools. Thanks Devlyn.