Dabble:

you are right

It's a fine line between taking responsibility for your life and accepting blame for if it isn't turning out quite how you like it....I've battled depression for some time now and you are completely right - it does feel as if all is happiness and flying toasters, and then something jogs, and the brown colored glasses come over and you have to push your way out.  I wasn't able to do it without pharmacological assistance, myself, and am grateful for it, although I did try and deny I needed it.  Even so, I find sometimes my perspective just isn't right - I start blaming myself for not being as wonderful as I feel I should be, and then the world starts letting me down, etc.

It's taken me a long time to a. recognize this and realize that, for me, it is definitely a hormonal thing, and b. figure out how to ignore it.  I know it will pass.  I just have to keep myself from saying anything too stupid until it does.  If you look at my blog over my time with tools, you can see me surf up and down and up and down. 

It has also helped to have an excellent counsellor who told me that there is an underlying problem that might be leading into these bouts, so I'm working on that, too.

Good luck to you.  I think the most helpful thing I learned in Tools is that you can really only control your attitude. So I try every day to do that.  The rest is gravy. 

Sending you a hug

Wordsmith:

Knowing is half the battle.

Okay, I've never had depression, except of the situational kind, but I know what it's like to feel down and to be down on oneself.  I know that understanding the problem is a large part of the solution.  Once you understand that, you can start taking steps toward the rest of the solution.  It seems like you're on your way.  Great!

Sending you a  big hug.  You can do it.

Krystalshard:

Reality

Daily, in-your-face, unavoidable and undesirable too.  But as the previous comments mentioned, taking action, choosing a perspective, changing your attitude... they're all up to you.  Meds or not, good-day or bad-day all around you, it's your game.  YOU play it.  See, you are now using these TOOLS, and it's a specialized training camp for the "athletes" of life.  You have held on so far, so you know you've got it in you.  Look how far you've come... and give yourself a break. So, listen to the inner voice and relax!  We all want for you to "succeed".