Day 78 Aftermath

My goal in part is to get to past day 78. I started Tools to Life about a year ago and found new life and changes with each day. The family and friends noticed as each day went by how much I was changing and how much I was enjoing my life and how positve I had become.I greated each day and could not wait to log on to Tools for Life each morning. The law of postive attaction was working good and postive things were coming my way.One of these was the opportunity to take a family working vacation at a Rodeo in BC's Interior with friends every thing was great I got closer to and my pride  increased for my daughters as they help me behind the chutes . My wife and I also became closer and we enjoyed time spend with our friends . I then took the opportunity to hunting with an old friend in BC's backcountry. I knew that I would not be able to log in but to me that was not a promblem

as I had gone days before where access was not easy , but I had always log in at the first chance and looked forward to it. When I got back home Iwas ready to go at it again , but something changed the first thing was when my wife who had returned before me had found out that her job of 9 years had let her 

go as well as me and our daughters who had worked with her part time . While this was a shock we look on this as a opportunity to start somthing new and we looked forward to it with some excitment.Meanwhile day 76 came up and I did not log in but intended to later on . A couple days later I did but something had changed I shugged it off and was looking to work on it. Day 77 came and went and I did not log in I told myself it was because I was helping my family overcome the job loss and that my stepson who had terminal Brain cancer had tried to end his time with a overdose of pain meds. Again day 77 pasted and it had been 2 weeks since I logged in and things had become more intense as my stepson had been asked to leave by his wife for reasons that she could not look after him and because this had been his 2nd attemt she feared what this was doing to the 2 small kids. Fair enough we thought , I would become his caregiver as I had the opportunity because I had not replaced my job yet and the outlook was that he had a very limited amount of time left. I did log into day 77 and promised I would do day 78 first chance ,well that chance never happened, or I never did take the time even though I would log in time to time  I would never finish it. After what has seemed a long hard 9 months filled with sorrows as ED passed away Jan 18, and with personal promblems adding up overdrinking ,anger ,depression and finances, everything I worked on up to Day 77 seemed gone.So today after getting help for the medical promblems and looking at myself deeply I want to commit myself to starting over and getting past day 77 and making it to Day 90 and getting the life I deserve and I will have a great day once again.

Thanks for reading JD 

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