Attitude and starting over.
Mon, May 07 12:00 AM
Today's tool was about accepting responsibility for my attitude and it could not have been better timed. I woke up on the first ring of the clock, although my eyes did not actually open ( I have the clocked moved across the room so I actually bumped into a few things on the way). I clapped my hands together (quietly as my hubby is still sleeping and said, "I am having a great day" but I did not feel it. The deep breath in almost turned into a snore going back out and I considered stumbling back to my bed (the weekend was way to exciting and I did not conscientiously try to apply a single tool). Instead I went to the sink and patted my face with water. I have determined the energetic splashing thing was designed by a guy who probably is not wearing a shirt, so I pat. I smiled at the mirror and said, "This day belongs to God!" but wondered if He would mind if I went back to bed and blew off all my responsibilities today. The coffee pot burbling on cue and eyes now partially slit, I walked a little more confidently to the kitchen. I started out the window over the kitchen sink. I almost entered into a time fugue but some part of my mind, waking up faster than the rest of me possibly my inner voice (probably hoping I would pour that coffee) suggested that I would start to lose the benefit of getting this far if I did not go wake up the kids. It also noted that it was a beautiful day outside. I was not impressed. Still why should my kids suffer... "Up and Adam (why do I say that? we have no one named Adam)! Time to have a Great Day!" No surprise that my kids are not initially impressed either. In fact, at one point, I sent my 10 y.o. back to his room to "start over" because his attitude was not so much about a great day. Still the program appears to be working because we, in a mostly organized fashion, got out the door on time and to our destinations on time.
Then I got here and I thought "eh, this program, does it really have anything else to offer me? and won't it grow old or like so many other good intentions and great ideas go the way of the dinosaurs?" I start grazing through todays routine and I start thinking, wonder if there is a way to start over? I don't feel like I have mastered the stuff I have yet. Can I reset it?
But maybe it is like my son. Maybe the only starting over is going back to my room (or to a mirror if I would just follow the flippin' directions) and tell myself that my attitude is my choice. It really is a pretty day outside...