Day 13 - Fear

Yea, I've been slacking of late.  I don't have any real valid excuse I don't suppose.  I didn't get to it Sunday... and yesterday I opted to watch a movie.  I tried to do it last night but was falling asleep, so I just let it go on til today.

This fear bit is interesting.. I do find myself losing my focus on doing the checklist more and more these days.  I do maintain the first few steps and I see myself working a few of the later lessons in along the way, but I'm not on task for the most part.  

The last line on todays task list said something to effect of "Don't be scared!! This process works!!" (yea, I had to go back and look so I'd get it right).

So is that it?  Perhaps this thing does work and some unconscious fear is causing resistance?  I dunno... I mentioned before that I might go back a few days and reTools my work.  Part of me says thats just a cop out and that I should power through it and get my game together... part of me says it'd be good to get it right before I dig in any deeper and end up ditching this thing altogether. 

I dunno... sometimes its hard to discern which is the voice of reason.  Usually, I can tell... but not this time.  Maybe the Big Bad Voice is getting shifty on me and has disguised itself as the Good Little Voice.

However, (here we go - to the check list!) my opportunity lastnight, when I was too tired to keep my eyes opened and read my lessons was to get a good nights sleep.  I did.  I was asleep by 10 and got up at 5:50am - I decided that if I was going to pass out, I could get up a little earlier and do some stuff that I didn't get done lastnight.

Surely I'm not the only one (if anything, I've learned this about this place - I'm usually not the only one).  Does anyone have some experience with this?  So I might learn from your mistakes so I can move forward?  :) 

Some call it lazy, but I call it efficient.

Thanks for reading,

Shane13

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Tags: day 13, fear, Focus