Pride in Self

Yesterday I was so full of joy & excitement. It's a feeling I find I am unfamilure with. I actually jumped for joy as the emotions poured out. I had done something I was proud of myself for. I almost didn't do it, I almost talked myself out of it. Every weekend I like to relax, I don't want to work around the house, I don't want to socialize with friends, the work week stresses me out and I just want to putz around and relax.  I know this about myself. So when it came time to choose whether to work on a craft project or relax, I made myself work on the project. I do intricate scroll saw work. This was a puzzel of a motorcycle cut out of wood with my saw. The pattern was in a magazine over 6 months ago - translation - I've unknowingly denighed myself of this joy for over 6 months.  The pattern was a puzzel, so each peice fit intricately into the next peice, one slip of the saw blade and it could be ruined. It took a lot of concentration, I had to stay on the lines, and when it was done, this feeling came over me. And as I put the peices I had cut back into themselves and assembled the puzzel I jumped for joy as I had done something amazing, something no one else I know could have done. I was overflowing with pride in my work. At that moment I realized that it does matter. Every weekend for months on end as I choose not to work on a craft project I told my self it doesn't matter. It makes no difference. Enjoy your free time doing nothing as you wish. But doing nothing gets me nothing.  And just knowing "I could make that" gives me nothing in comparison to "Look - I DID THIS!!!!".  You will find me in the wood shop more often I can guarantee!

PS: to view some of my work or see what I mean by a puzzel - there are some dog ones here - visit www.woodenpets.com

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