Things That Go Bump !

It's been a couple of days pot free, and

very interesting that Coach would talk

about The Big "Bump" today.

Yesterday was a series of small trials

one after the other that made for a

very unique series of emotional "hurdles."

Luckily, I quit cigarettes 15 years ago,

and have quit pot before, so I knew

what to expect. I also knew that if

anything successful was going to of

come my doing Tools, that I was going

to have to win in the emotional arena

before I could win in the "outward"

arena !

My girlfriend and I have been working

hard daily without a day off, and we

looked forward to a quiet and romantic

day together.

Every step of the way went wrong.

It was wonderful!

First of all, I hadn' had time to

work on my new business all

week online, and I wanted to

do it Sunday with all my heart!

But, I yielded the day to my

Darling, and agreed to spend

time with her. The beginning

of the need for patience....

I smiled inside once in a while, saying

to myself, "OK! here we go! I'm staying

in control....I'm being a man, I'm staying

in control, I'm smiling through this!"

It was amazing though, everything

went wrong, from second to second

almost! Just as we were leaving for

the beach, she got a call that she

was scheduled to work being with

her client with Alzeimers.

It was an unexpected schedule

change.

Dont get me wrong, we both love

the lady, but we really were looking

forward to being alone.

She asks the same questions over

and over all day. Patience.

We drove he beach with our dog,

and-no dogs allowed---Patience

The sign said, No Swimming. It was a

State park for boaters. Patience

We asked where there was a beach

we could go that allowed such

amenities, and we drove the 14

miles to find another beach.

The first section of lake we came to

said No Swimming ! Patience!

No dogs allowed. Patience Stephen !

My gf is smoking cigs---stinky!

Patience.

More repetitive questions, over and

over. Patience. Smile Stephen !

Im almost out of gas, and low on

funds, Patience!

We got home, and her son needed

a ride home from where he was.....

no romantic quiet times yet! Patience!

He had no gas money to offer. More

patience!

My stomach is in knots from the trials

AND it's also my withdrawal symptom.

Sort of as mild queasiness and

headache. More patience.

My car wont start because the brake

pedal pushes on the brake light button,

and it gets stuck. I cant find it to unstick

it, and dont see the lights on in the hot

sun, and it wore the battery down.

Much much more patience.

The same questions over and over

every ten minutes. Patience.

I'm thinking to myself...."Ok....This

is a trial, I'm not going to be "jonesing"

for pot....Im smiling, even though my

"flesh" wants to complain and throw

a tirade. I'm simply not giving in.

It's not in Tools...It's not part of

the program....It's not nice to my

girlfriend, or resourceful on my part.

I refuse to give in and be a bottle

sucking baby.

I didnt.

I thought of the word...MAGNANIMOUS

I had to. I had to be bigger and stronger.

I had to be resourceful, and a gentleman

for my girlfriend.

I had to be the tower she could rest in,

the shoulder she could rest on.

We finally got home.

Then, one reward for my

patience.....my girlfriend found my

mp3 player I lost in a bag with beers

in it that was placed in the freezer

to speed cool and forgoten. !!!!!!!!!

OK! Cool! A reason to Smile !

Ive just recieved really bad news

again....Im going off this blog right

now...but it's all good...not to worry!

What doesn't kill me will make me

stronger.

I will be here tomorrow....and through

the trials like Smilinsteve......I have to

live up to my nickname !

;) 

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Tags: emotional hurdles, bump, trials, patience, Smilinsteve, tools