Turn it around

I had to do a deposition for my personsal injury case today.  We were there for 10 and a half hours.  Unreal.

There were times when I felt like I was in the role of a victim after about 5 hours of constant questioning of specifics that one just can't remember after 4 years after the fact.  I had to keep saying, "I don't recall exactly," or "I don't remember."

One of the lawyers from the other side doing the questioning was getting frustrated with me because she was trying to trap me.  She would repeat some of the same questions 4 or 5 times the same way expecting a different response and I was just not going to let my emotions get the best of me and give her what she wanted.  I was not going to give her a statement about something I was unsure of just for the sake of shutting her up or making her move to the next question.  If I don't remember, I just don't.

Later, she did the same thing again and just would not accept the answer I had given and was getting an attitude and a smart mouth. My lawyer said that she had clearly over stepped her ground. 

I felt myself getting frustrated.  So I made the statement on record to that fact and that I sensed a bad attitude coming from the lawyer.  I needed to take a break at that point and looked at my lawyer to tell him so.

I quick hush came over the meeting and she backed off instantly!  She humbly agreed and gave me 5 minutes, but I took a little longer because that's what I needed.  (It was made clear from everbody there that I could break as often as I'd like or needed)

I felt empowered.  I took control back and didn't allow myself to be in the victim role.  I remembered that I needed to "get into character," as one of the lessons teaches us. 

I thought about how I wanted to come across, my boundries, and that I was the "star of the show."  I held my shoulders back and pretended that I was being interviewed by reporters and I was in control.

My lawyer corrected the lawyers when they would get out of line but he told me that he was so proud that I had pulled it back together and I had done and excellent job getting through this difficult deposition.

I have Tools to thank for that.  So Thanks Coach Steele.  You are wonderful and this site is valuable to me. The tools really do work.

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Tags: Controlling difficult situations