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Wed, Feb 07 12:00 AM

Alcoholic

 This has been a topic that has scared me for years. I come from a long line of alcoholics and I've always been fearful of following in their footsteps. On one hand i feel like i do have a problem... I have blacked out in the past and I've definetly bowed down to the porcelin godess more then i'd like to admit, but I also don't feel my life is unmanagable. I never drink alone and I don't drink every day. I feel like i can stop once I've started... blah blah blah .... then i feel like maybe i'm making up excuses????? Me = so confused. Hopefully I'm not an alkie, but if i am I certainly hope i don't have to hit rock bottom to find out.

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The Connector The Connector:

Binge Drinking

Hi Bounce,

 

I have just read your blog and it reminds me of where i used to be 4 years ago.

 

I never thought i was an alchoholic or anything but i used to drink 3 days a week Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I felt great while i was doing it and thought i had heaps of great friends. I was spending my spare money on going out and partying.

 

Then one day after i had a huge night. This awful feeling hit me. My heart started to race at 150 beats a minute and it was like this for 3 hours. I had to go in to Hospital Emergency Dept and i thought i was having a heart attack. It scared the shit out of me.

 

I was told my binge drinking had damaged my liver and i was so badly dehydrated that my body was shutting down. As i lay there thinking i was dying it was sooooo lonely and i said to myself, if i get out of this i will never drink again.

 

I have been true to my word, however the friends i used to drink with, think i am soft and have pretty much written me off. I have realised they only wanted me to drink with them not be a true friend.

 

Since i have stopped drinking my business life has taken off  and i have a heap of new friends.

 

The saying you are what you think is true. If you think it you can do it you can.

 

 So Bounce do your self the biggest favour of your life. Stop making excuses about drinking. Think of this as your tap on the shoulder because i know if you want to have a great life. Alcohol is not going to help you. Drinking is an absolutely huge thing, most people your age do it and think it is cool.

 

I think you would be cool if you could learn to live without the demon drink, you will be so much healtheir, you will have so much more money and you will be so much a happier person.

 

I am here for you if you ever want to talk to me. I know you can do it, i see what you have written in your blog as a cry for help. I am here to help you if you want it.

 

I hope you have a great healthy happy life

 

Regards

The Connector

EricShelby EricShelby:

Connector

Connector,

 

Bravo for your response and your viewpoint.

Bounce, I hope you make the right decisions, which I am sure you know deep down already.

Wordbird Wordbird:

That Leap of Faith

wow you got some great feedback which I hope feels good to you. I agree, we know in our hearts what the real deal is. We know, yet at another level we want to keep arguing about it.  Whether you have a sort of, kind of or really bad problem isn't the point. The point is, is this a happy, safe, good way to live? Is this the best you? Is this taking you somewhere good, in your future? Is your head in the toilet what you are about?  What about all the stuff you didn't mention? Those of us who have been there, and I have too, we know there is a lot of other stuff that is upsetting, scary, crazy, dangerous or sad...a lot going on, besides these things you mention. You've talked about some of it in other blogs. People who get hurt. People you lose. Nutty, upsetting stuff that goes on while everyone is pretending what a blast they are having. But admitting things is scary. Change is scary. FlyByNight can promise you his life got much better, but you don't know what will change, in yours. It takes a lot of guts to take the chance. I figure you've thought about some ways you can look into this and find some support.  Plus you have some offered. I hope you keep sharing and blogging, until you are ready to truly believe that your life can be MUCH better than it is right now. You know that MIGHT be true, cuz you are here doing the Tools!

Flybynight Flybynight:

What is an Alcoholic?

I am full of admiration for you Bounce & for Connector. Well done both of you.
I read that one definition of an alcoholic is someone who realises the harm that drinking does to them, but goes ahead & drinks anyway! That's quite a hard definition, & by that definition many of us are alcoholics, & I certainly was!
I too come from a family history, & felt how I think that you expressed yourself ........ that there was an inevitability, almost an obligation to drink too much. For many years I drank more than I should, & assumed that I was powerless not to.
3 months ago that stopped. I can't actually tell you why, I had no "revelation of St. Paul" like Connector, no life changing event. It has been the culmination of many years thought, & I just decided that it was something that I wanted not to do.
Contributory factors helping me make the decision have been that my wife & my doctor have both left me to make my own decisions. Whilst I am sure they both like the idea of my being healthier, neither has been judgemental, nor pressurised me to cut down.
I had stopped drinking before I discovered this program, but I think the reasons that enabled me to stop are the same as this program's philosophy. It sounds stupid to say it, but simply I never realised before that I had the choice.
I now realise that I can choose whether to drink, most of the time I chose not to because I feel better. However there are times when I want to drink (e.g. New Years Eve was one, last week's holiday was another) & I will. That's all part of the chosing not to drink too much.
In summary - I think that you know whether you drink more than you want to. I also think that this program is about enabling us to realise that we have the choice to do what we want to.