Hi, guest!
Join Now
Login
Password

forgotten your password?

Join Now cat_1281's Blog
 
cat_1281
# # # #

Birth Date: Fri, Jan 02 1981

Place of residence:
Tulsa Ok, United States (map)

I am: Single & Not Dating

Schools: Charles Page High School, Alumni 1999

Jobs:


Certificates:
Tools Program Stats:
Member Since: 12/26/07
Last Login: 08/27/08
Viewed: 3504
Program in:
Program Progress: Day 3
cat_1281's Challenges:

cat_1281's Participating:
Personal Interests:
Music:
Books:
Favorite Places:
I Want To See:
Hobbies:
Activities:
Sports:
Movies:
TV:
Heroes:
I Want To Meet:
Tools Goal List:

Areas In My Life I Want To Work On

I Want To Quit Or Control

Skills I Am Interested In

I Suffer From

cat_1281's Life List:
To be a good mother to my daughter.
To go back to school and earn a degree, preferably in education.

Info

 

Archives

 
Just thinking visually

 

 

1
cheers
cheer it
cat_1281

  cat_1281

Wed, Dec 26 12:00 AM

Just thinking visually

 

You know, I guess that a side effect of depression or whatever this funk I am in is not really seeing whats going on around me until its almost too late to do anything about it.  I have not been as good of a mother as I should be, I have a bubbly bouncing chatty intelligent 5 year old who is an absolute joy yet Joy isn't in my daily dialogue with myself anymore.  Just a lot of I wish and I want and I hope, and not a lot of action.

 

"I must lose myself in action, lest I wither in despair"

 

Its not that I don't have a lot to do, I do.  I have a house that was totally trashed by My aunt and my grandmother and people going in and out all the time, and I have another house to move out of that belongs to a friend of mine.  I moved into his house because living with My grandma and 5 other people and having people in and out all hours of the night was just too much for me to cope with.  Now they have all moved out and I have to move back into the house that they were staying in and Im left with the destruction.  They left everything in filth and turmoil, and Im close to being OCD about organization and cleanliness, it comes from working in fast food for half my life, I guess.  At least my friend is clean, his house was almost spotless when I moved in and will be that way when I get my things moved out too.  Living in his home in a quiet neighborhood with just my little girl has been like a vacation for me, and has allowed me to get myself together.  Im not quite all the way there yet, but if i had had to stay here I would be completely insane by now.  Anyway, I am making progress, the house is getting cleaned up and back in order, just not as quickly as I would like it to be.  But hey I guess Rome wasn't built in a day, right?

# Comment (1) # View (102) # Show support

# Tags:

 

This post is cheered by: