Oh well, i dont really know where  to start - I was a really happy kid, My parents were terrific.  My dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer of the bladder in 1998 and I guess thats kind of where my story really begins. He passed away 1/15/2000, 10 days after his 51st Birthday, 13 days after I turned 19.  I thought that I was ok, bereaved but ok, but we lost our house 6 months later and I had a mental collapse.  I didn't even get out of bed for two weeks, and I only know that because thats what my family says.  I dropped out of an excellent college with a 3.0 GPA and just went to work.  I drank and had a substance abuse problem, I dated a guy for just over a year that hit me all the time, I met my best friend and he convinced me to leave him, I started seeing a guy with a girlfriend and got pregnant and I did quit drinking and stopped all the drugs right then, that day, cold turkey.  I had been diagnosed and treated for cervical cancer only a few months prior to getting pregnant, and was told I could not carry a child full term but I wanted to try.  My daughter was born 8 weeks premature, less than 4lbs but very healthy and happy and whole, my little miracle. Deciding to try to carry my child is the best decision I have ever made, one of the few things im proud of.  After she was born, however, I continued to make stupid ass mistakes, in spite of having an angel on my shoulder trying to give me guidance to make better decisions.  And even though I never listened to him, he was always there to comfort me when the stupid stuff I did finally caught up with me.  I got married to someone who had never been good to me and now I am getting divorced from him.  I have two wonderful friends who have been very supportive and understanding and I owe a lot to them.  My family has been there for me recently much more than in the past and its good to have them here.  this isn't my whole story, just the part about stuff that I had control over and I screwed up.  The point is is that I am turning over a new leaf for 2008, and Im going to be a better, stronger person, and I will make better decisions and I will listen to my angels.