Feeling hopeless

so i have talked before about my job, and things have only gotten exponentially worse! and i was ready to make a move to end the misery but then my wifes car just craps out! its been stuttering for a couple weeks and we thought it was a problem with the transmition but once we got it to an autozone to do one of there little computer checks it showed it was just plugs and wires, this was great! we can fix that at home! its tough because whoever designed the 99 cirrus crammed a LOT under that hood! but we get the stuff to fix it and get a great cool sunday to work on it and when we pull the first plug wire it was covered in oil! as were the next two but luckily the actual plugs looked pretty good.  So we cant fix that, so there is problem one.  Problem two was her brakes had been acting funny almost the exact amount of time the stuttering was going on.  so a couple weeks ago we took the wheels off to check the rotor and pads and they were spotless still, so its got to be a symptom of the stutter, or so we thought! when the plugs showed their ugly faces i called my brother for advise and just happened to mention the brakes and he said check the brake fluid.  guess what, its reservoir was almost empty and they are anti lock brakes so we cant do that at home either! Lovely!  so we were cautioned to just go easy on the car, dont go too fast only drive when absolutely necessary.  then we had a surprising stroke of good luck! her cousin and a buddy of his that owns a garage called and told her they didnt have a car to work on for fun this saturday and if she could get it there they wouldnt charge her any labor!!  so she has not moved the car since sunday, till last night!  we had discussed how she was going to get the car to that garage, its about 30 miles away and she felt she could drive it up there tomorrow (with our son in the car) since she had kinda mastered its weird behavior.  but late last night she and i were both a little down about the job thing and she offered to go get ice cream! i didnt want her to drive that car but its just a couple miles so she went.  about 20 minutes later she calls to tell me the brakes went out and she had hit a curb. so once she calmed down it turned out that she went to sonic and parked to order, when she put it in reverse it just started to roll on its own like the brakes werent even there and the e brake didnt do anything either! luickly the parking lot was empty and she just rolled back over the curb but in doing so she broke either the gas tank or the fuel line because all her gas just slowly poured out.  luckily, again, the fire department is like a block away so they were there almost immediately and made sure nothing happened. so my gut reaction was pissed at me for letting her go, and pissed at her for being over confident about being able to control the brakes.  but then i started to think that if this had not happened she would have been on the interstate friday with our son in the car probably doing 55-60 when they went out!!! that ice cream trip saved their lives!!  but now what do we do, its at the garage, she is save, but now i have this horrible job issue that i thought i had resolved but now may be stuck in to pay this bill! it has made me so miserable that it is affecting my home life, i know i shouldnt let it but its like every time i get a day off something happens that just makes my job that much worse! i have lost all faith, and the only thing that makes me happy is spending time with my wife and most of all my son!!  i never thought i could love someone as much as i love him! but when work contacted me tuesday and i got mad and he accidently spilled a cup of coffee all over the couch i screamed at him worse than i ever have before (it was just volume, all i said was his name) but it scared him to death and i knew then i had to leave this place, even though i have no safety net, no job lined up, no savings.  but with one car in the shop its just that much harder to figure out how to make it all work.  if there are any bankers out there that can offer me advise on lowering my student loan payments it would be much appreciated!! man did i jump between topics today but it feels good to get this out there. thanks!!

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