I  was worried about the black cloud coming again, and it did... the feelings where all too familiar, but not justified like last time. I thought I was happy, I had every reason to be. But the tears come more and more often in my happy life and I really feel guilty when I cry. I have so much to feel blessed for , so why do I feel this way?

 

How quickly do things change, only a few weeks (or has it been months) ago I was feeling lucky, privileged. Now one bad word and I cry, some times silently some times loudly. Some nights I cry the minute the children sleep, and I dont know why. I was the words of a friend to another friend that made me realise just how badly I felt and how much I lie to myself. How do I snap out of it this time?

 

I have spent so long hiding my feelings from others, that I feel that I have lost a part of myself in the process... and I really dont know where to look!