Wordbird: 2008-06-22

says: I agree. Sounds like he just got divorced, hit an age landmark or otherwise is drowning in nostalgia and "if only's..." I might thank him for the compliments, wish him great things and ignore the "proposal" that isn't. Make it clear you have moved on. (and congrats for a happy relationship!) Is more respectful to current love to move on quickly with this, too.

aliviabiko: 2008-03-15

says:

Gloria, Do you have an update on this? I would say you don't need to do a reply in person because it was an e-proposal. Clearly this guy doesn't even know you now if it has been 4 years. He is proposing to the old you, or the you he has made up in his head. You can let him down gently in an email, and that fits the proposal.

It is an odd thing to have challenge you, but you are up to it, and whatever you decide, however you decide to do it will be right for you.

Blessings on you.

Alivia 

Sending you a hug

seaside_barbie: 2008-03-11

says:

I agree with Timber, its nice of you to give this guys feelings as much consideration as you are.

I think that the kindest way to do this is to be honest, and respectful in your honesty.

I think it would work well to explain that you are in a relationship, in which you are very happy, and that unfortunately, his timing is not good! But that you are so glad about the things he is doing with his life, and how incredibly flattered you are.

I would do it face-to-face, but that's just me. I think a proposal rejection warrants at least a coffee. And, um, are you totally sure this isn't worth pursuing? It's pretty cool this guy is still thinking of you.....sounds like your mind is made up. Just be kind - but don't feel guilty. His happiness is not your responsibility, but I think you do owe him consideration and courtesy. I'm sure you will handle this well.

TimberAllen: 2008-03-09

says:

You sound like a warm and caring person, I can understand your wanting to let the lad down easy.

I'm old fashioned, therefore I believe with all my heart that honesty is the best policy.

Its OK to say no!  In fact, I've not used it enough in my past.  Now I realize its really saying 'no' to others, but 'yes' for myself.  Its very liberating!

If he was really serious about presuing you for marrage, why would he consider email a proper corrospondance? You've had experience in Corrections and Teaching, I bet not much gets by you!

Many blessings! 

Stand Tall and live with passion!