My many names in life

This has been a surprisingly fascinating Tools day.  I was a bit resistant at first, but when I started playing and looking around I made several discoveries and more to follow I'm sure.

One of my first relationships to my name was when I got in trouble as a little girl.

"Debra Louise Thompson!" wasn't a good feeling name...and to this name I use it only on legal paperwork.

I actually disliked the name so much that I attempted to change it when I was getting my driver's license.

I thought all I needed to do was fill out my driver's license Name: blank with whatever name I wanted and I could be someone else.

It was such a LITTLE change...I could now call myself "Deborah" not "Debra" in attempt to release myself of the baggage associated with my legal name.

Later something came up legally...probably my first social security card and I had to go back and change everything to my birth name...I wasn't very happy about that.

I married when I was 21 and I took my husband's last name...Bair.  I really thought this short little name would be better, but found that I was always having to spell it and I was constantly asking people to take the "l" out...it's not Blair.

I had multiple incompletions with my father at one time and I didn't want anything to do with HIS last name...who was to know a name would be so meaningful?

I kept my married name for several years following my divorce.  I said I wanted my military friends to be able to find me.

Time went by and I had created many completions with my Dad and our relationship grew.  All of a sudden I wanted "Thompson" back...interesting.

A childhood name I had was "Monkey".  Only Dad called me that.

The interesting part was right before he died from a cancerous cerebellar brain tumor (when I was in my twenties) he ended up in a nursing home.

I stopped to see him (I lived in Colorado at that time...he in Illinois) and the nurses told me how my Dad had not recognized anyone for weeks.

I was determined that before I left he would recognize me and he would know that I had been there.

I was flirting with giving up when all of a sudden he spoke his first words in weeks...guess what he said?

"Hi, Monkey."

I was so happy and overjoyed...I had tears running down my cheeks and I said "Hi, Dad".

My mission was complete.  He died a few weeks later...I was so happy I was able to connect with him one last time.

Multiple names followed...13 1/2 years in the Air Force...Airman Bair...Seargent Bair...Staff Seargent Bair...Tech Seargent Thompson.

Then graduating from chiropractic school I acquired a whole new group of names...Doctor...Doc...Dr. Thompson...Dr. Debbie Thompson...Dr. T...Dr. Debbie...

The funny part is one day you're in school and the next week you're a doctor.

The first time someone addressed me as "doctor" I looked around to see who they were talking to... (smiles).

I didn't realize what a great relationship I have with my name now...and how I relate to that name.

I used to "act" confident...powerful...and now I am that.

At times I would "act" playful and like I was having fun...and now it is some of my richest essence.

My Mom said to me one day in 2003, "I didn't realize what a magical intuitive daughter I had until now."

That was a very treasured moment...especially when I knew what she said was the truth...my truth.

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Tags: Self Expression, creativity, success