Married for 26yrs.6mths with divorce postponed until November(not my idea) and my Narcissistic Personality Disorder Husband who abused me mentally, psychologically, verbally, financially and sexually, who to this day still abuses me finacially( by withholding money from court ordered interim maitenance) and verbally by email with threats at every opportunity.
In brief, 3/1/81 we made a committment to each other and he moved into MY home. At the time he was articling(sp?), had absolutely nothing and I was worth over 350,000.00. He became a partner in the Law Firm after our marriage. I entered into the world of Real Estate and eventually made as much money as he did. He was Medically forced to retire because of Congestive Heart Failure in 1992 and I also went on a small disability because of my own health. I nursed him 24/7 from then until and during his Heart Transplant in Oct.1998 to the detriment of my own health. After finaly bringing him home @Xmas I continued as before, catering to his every need. I loved and trusted him unconditionally. As he recovered, more and more he was away golfing, sitting as president on this board, Chairman on another, Director on another etc., going to dinners (claiming I was NOT invited) spending very little time with me. Several times per year I would approach him and ask if we could get closer like we were before, if we could maybe try intimacy again, but nothing ever happened. My thought about this was that because of his medicine he could NOT have sex and hurt as I was I accepted this but would still ask from time to time for a hug.
At the end of Fall, 2005 I broached the subject once again and was over the moon when he said, "Yes, I want this also"! When we went away at Xmas, he "had sex" (he did not make love) with me for the first time in 14yrs., it was to be the last time forever as it turned out. He returned home earlier than I did, the excuse was meetings but would return. He did not return and when I went home in such happy anticipation, he told me to move out it was over. No explanation, no talking it out, denying he had an affair but insisting it (the marriage) was over. He served me with divorce papers. The shock and disbelief hit me later. I did not move out, he did and the threats began. He took ALL of the Assetts with him i.e. Furniture, Silver, Aeroplane, Stocks, Shares, Options, Brand New Car and much more. He had NO Debt I was told, the debt was ALL mine, even his personal line of credit. He moved in with his Adulterous Affair. I was left with over $240,000.00 debt to service whith no prior knowlege of.
As an Attorney, he had planned and schemed for this day for almost two decades. He meticulously over the years with lies has alienated me from everyone I have ever known including my own daughter (his step daughter). The outcome of his plan (which he has documented for the divorce proceedings) is that Christmas 2008 all maintenance will stop. I will have no home, no medical, no income and will still be at least $7,500.00 in debt.
I WILL NOT LET THIS HAPPEN!!!! NOW I HAVE FIGHT IN MYSELF AND CONFIDENCE BACK.
Although I will never be able to undo the horrendous lies he has perpetuated or ever be back with my (our) very large social group, my prayer is that the truth be made clear in Court - "For the Truth will set me Free"!
I know I am sane, beautiful, have a gorgeous figure, 36-25-33, dark hair down to my knees, weigh 118lbs(need to gain 2lbs, I lost so much during this past year and 1/2), am talented, smart, have a BA degree, brilliant Dancer and Instructor, Artist and sculpturer,
all of which are contrary to his abusive remarks to me and about me. The woman? he is living with looks ten yrs older than me although 15 yrs. younger, is pudgy, clothes hang on her like sacks, she has heavy dark bags under her eys, has hardly any hair and is UGLY and she knew he was married when beginning the affair.
"Vengeance is mine" sayeth The Lord. I finaly turned it over to Him.
Here I am now to build back that self esteem, get back to living, make new friends and at any cost, NOT end up on welfare.
This is the one and only time I want to refer to the past. Today onward is my priority.
If you read this, thanks for your support.
Jacky
