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Join Now Loosing Focus by joyeverlasting7
 
joyeverlasting7
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Birth Date: Sat, Sep 28 1957

Place of residence:
Sarasota Florida, United States (map)

I am: Married

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Member Since: 02/28/09
Last Login: 03/11/10
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joyeverlasting7's Challenges:
To get below 200 pounds
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Loosing Focus

 

 

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joyeverlasting7

  joyeverlasting7

Fri, Apr 24 11:22 AM

Loosing Focus

 

I know I am usually the one that is all up and encouraging but today has held a few more blows than even I could take and I guess I have lost focus.

 

Without going into what is going on an event occurred that led to my husband having to be out of town for awhile. I was dealing with it and making the best. Planning for his return. 

 

Today I hear he may be gone longer than expected. 

 

Now I waited till late in life to get married because I wanted to make sure I married my soul mate. Which I did by the way. He is a wonderful man that is so precious, kind and loving. 

 

All my life I had lived with the fear that I would be be alone and grow old and have no one. After the news today that old fear raised it's ugly head. 

 

Now all of the self doubts that maybe I didn't deserve a wonderful man like him to begin with and so on have been going through my head.

 

If it was in his control he would be here. I feel bad for feeling like I do but I feel cheated. I am left here to deal with all the bills and everything. This April we would have been married 8 years. 

 

I know God change situations but right now I am feeling all of these feelings and thoughts are going through my head and focusing on me and doing what is best for me today is the farthest thing from my mind. 

 

I love and miss my husband so much and want the situation taken care off.

# Comment (4) # View (447) # Show support

# Tags: Focus, Depression

 

This post is cheered by:

Bda Bda


 

comments

kmcm kmcm:

Sometimes life is hard...

Though it is hard, you must keep focusing forward... and onyourself moving forward.

Wont he be coming back?  What on earth could keep him away?  Can you not join him?

aartisans aartisans:

Re: Loosing Focus

Hi there joyeverlasting,

 

I really like your name by the way. First I need to introduce myself. I am a busy pastor and artist, so I tend to pop in and out of TOOLS. I'm on my 19th day, and I'm delighted to be back here communicating and posting.

 

I am a single lady living on my own too, and I was just thinking about that before I read your post. I sort of realised I created my being alone because I really like being a hermit at the moment, however having a loving partner can be kinda nice too. It's tough when someone you love is away, especially when there are other problems around like household bills that one is concerned about. Obviously I don't know the whole of your story, but I would like you to know that you are not alone and you don't have to feel lonely, as you do have friends here who care about you, and you can lean on your friends here a bit more if you need to. What sort of hobbies do you enjoy?

 

Peace AartisansCool

paperqueen paperqueen:

Control

Our suffering, our loneliness, our pangs for companionship come about especially when we think there is no one around to take care of us; no one around to pay attention to us, no one around to listen.  The fact is we are alone with ourselves.  The only situation we can control is our own. We have to take care of ourselves. Yet, we think it's up to someone else to come home and take care of things, to control things for us.

 

There is more strength and more love when we think about changing our situation in a positive way.  If you are down and your husband is truly your soul mate, please give him a call and let him know you're having a hard time with the bills and see if he has any advice to ease your situation. "Dealing with everything" can change to "dealing with some things." Perhaps you feel overwhelmed and need to take some small steps as Coach  advises.

 

Take care.  And, yes, you did deserve a wonderful man like him.  And, yes, he does deserve you. May spring flowers brighten your table and your day.

Bda Bda:

Sending you a hug

Thanks for sharing.  I like that you are honest about what is going on. That will serve you.  You have faith and friends.  And you also have tools. Very powerful combinations!