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jpwjmw764
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Birth Date: Sat, Sep 02 1972

Place of residence:
Oxford MI, United States (map)

I am: Married

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Member Since: 05/14/10
Last Login: 06/07/10
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2010-05-15 14:38:47

kouzento

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Hi! Giving you a welcoming boost! :)

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For years my wife and I have lacked an emotional connection in our marriage, and now suddenly my wife is chatting on facebook with an old boyfriend and it is tearing my up.  Should I be worried or happy for her?  She said it is allowing herself to feel again since her and the ex (over 17 years ago) had a troubled relationship and she has held those feelings against our marriage.  We have been married 12 years.  I cannot stop dweling on the fact my wife seems more excited to chat with others than talk with me.  But over the last few years, I guess we really have drifted apart and I understand I also  had a lack of emotions which added to the issues.  How do I get over these insecure feelings?  She tells me not to worry she has never felt better or stronger for us.

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dude_reino dude_reino at 2010-06-02

says:

I spend quite a bit of time on Facebook, so let me ask you some things.

 

Is she writing very long-winded emails back and forth with him?  How many 'back-and-forth' messages have occured?  Are they still writing emails or have they moved on to wall postings.

 

From my experience, initial contact with 'an old friend' usually results in about four or five emails (how are you? what have you been up to? etc.)--then it ends.  You become 'friends' and for the rest of your Facebook relationship, you just post short messages on your friend's wall.

 

Continued sending of emails beyond the 'first contact' period should be a cause for suspicion. 

 

I hope this makes sense.

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I joined TOOLS because:
 I want to better express myself with my wife and have an open honest and loving relationship with her.
You are offered your dream job. What job is it?:
 Pro Motocrosser. I have already raced recreational, but to be on the big stage would be awesome.
My favorite wild animal is:
 Snakes
Why (describe as much as possible):
 So many people are freaked out by them, yet they seem so simple. No legs, no fur, just a tongue, head, and eyes always looking for prey.
My favorite domestic animal is (if you choose dog be specific with breed etc):
 Honestly not a fan of pets or domestic animals. Maybe Chocolate Lab.
Why:
 I have a few friends with choc. labs and those dogs are smart, strong, and just fun to play with.
Five people either dead or alive you would have at your fantasy dinner party::
 Layne Staley, Kevin Smith, Neil Falon, Rickey Carmichael, Travis Pastrana
Why:
 Love music and huge fan of Clutch and Alice in Chains. Kevin Smith's movies are so funny, but really can relate to how things so simple in life really should be seen more as funny! The MX guys, just because they are Idols in the MX world.
If a pilot would fly you anywhere you want, you would go to:
 Australia
My perfect slice of pizza is:
 Pepperoni, Ham, & Black Olives
You are at a bar. You order this drink:
 Depends on the mood. Beer = Something Dark (porter or stout). Wine = Cab. Cocktail = Jameson on the Rocks!
You are at a coffee shop. What coffee or tea do you order:
 Coffee - with (1) cream. No Sugar
If a genie could grant you three wishes they would be (separate by commas):
 Go back in time to start over with my wife, give me the ability to race MX as fast as the fastest guys in the world, allow me to be confident and in control of my emotions
You are going on a long road trip and you can only bring three CD's. Which ones do you bring (separate by commas):
 Clutch - Beal Street, Clutch - Stange Cousins, Rev Peyton's Big Damn Band
A sunset I remember:
 On the beach in Hawaii