Holymoly. It's been ages since I stopped doing the work, I think. I've been stuck because I don't have anything to record a cassette or something and haven't come up with a good solution to this problem.
Then there has been the biggest quarrell ever in my family. I haven't experienced anything like that. I told you that I had finished university.
Now there came the time for deciding which job to take. And I simply got stuck!
I couldn't find a good job that felt right to me in the hundreds of jobs that are out on the net. My Dad helped me look through them. My brother helped me, too.
Then I sat there with the papers and looked at the jobs and thought: I have to do that for some time. At least some years.
And I simply got stuck.
My parents told me on the one hand that I had the time to look through the jobs and decide on what I wanted to take on, but on the other hand I got this emotional and psychological pressure that told me that they wanted me to start a job the soonest I could. They kept hinting that we had two houses now and that my brother and me should pay something for the other house, too. Talk about being free to choose, hu?
Well, I talked a long time with my brother last Monday when I made the new photos for my CV. We went to McDonald's to eat and talked for hours. And that was the moment that I realised that he had the most emotional pressure of us two - I had only felt it for one week. He told me he had felt it the whole of his life. And he couldn't wait to get out of our family to live in his own home. I never knew these things.
After that we talked about jobs, and he just looked at me and said: "I cannot see you in these jobs that you have taken out of the net to look through them. You will wither like a flower there." And he went on to say: "I can really see you designing video games, inventing worlds, creating characters and settings, thinking about stories and such. Why don't you try that one?"
And while he talked about that I felt this big pressure lift off from my heart! I really knew for the first time that that is where my heart wants to go!
So now I will send my CV to Blizzard in France to get into the world of video games. I am so happy that I finally know what my heart beats for. What I want to do.
(BTW, I haven't told my parents about this decision, yet, because I want to show them the result I made myself: I got a job myself. And I don't want them to be upset or pushing me in this direction that I myself chose. Hope this is clear for you...)
Have FUN! I will definitely have it! ^_^