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Join Now when will it end! by mallory78
 
mallory78
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Birth Date: Fri, May 26 1978

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stoystown pennsylvania, United States (map)

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when will it end!

 

 

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mallory78

  mallory78

Tue, Mar 03 12:12 PM

when will it end!

 As if everything else wasn't enough, now I'm fighting with my parents!  Over stupid shit!  They are on my ass about everything.  If my jeans seem too tight or if I should be wearing socks and boots instead of my slip ons cause its cold.  My B/F made an arrangement with them...my dad would fix his computer and he would stack wood.  Well the first weekend he had a death in the family.  well his sis's husbands family. and he had to babysit for them.  This weekend his family was getting together.  So he only got half of the wood stacked.  He came in and explained to my dad that he had to leave and he would finish next week end....he lives almost two hours from me so he only comes on the weekends. Anyway my dad said ok and Chris left.  As soon as he was gone my parents blow up!  Screamin at me that he should have finished the job, that hes no good ect ect.  they were being so verbaly abusive to me I started to cry...I never cry...I hate to cry...I think it makes me weak.  Because I was crying my mother blew up on me told me I was trowing a temper tantrum and screaming at me to stop crying.  I'm a rapid cycling bipolar that is recovering from drugs.  I used drugs so I didn't have to feel.   So I am horrible at dealing with emotions!  So anyhow they decided that they don't think Chris should come to see me anymore!  He is the only good thing I have going for me right now.  He is a great support to me its hard  enough only seein him on the weekends!   I'm on house arrest right now so I have been court ordered to be here since Oct. 9th.  I have court this month and I should be able to get off house arrest once I go to these hearings...god i hope so.   I am plannin on moving back to Pittsburgh once I am able too.  I'm trying so hard to get my life on track but living here is making it so hard.  I feel like I'm walking on egg shells around here.  It's always something  and I just don't knw how to deal with it.  My mother keeps saying she knows once I'm gone I'll never come back...what she doesn't realize is she's pushing me to that....

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DetonNation DetonNation:

Those are pretty nasty things your parents said

They have come to expect the same old, same old and it is difficult when you are trying to redefine your life and they are still looking and acting toward you in the same old way. The best thing is to be true to yourself and remind yourself that your situation is only temporary and keep looking up. Tools will help you deal better with your emotions and to be responsible for yourself 100 percent of the time. So there is a lot going on, and tensions are high. I would just refuse to get into in with them and take the high ground. Good Luck! Mike

dgauld dgauld:

damn

They should really speak with Chris and not take it out on you. They had a deal and it's between them. If I were your parents and I was so stressed about getting some wood stacked (which is fucking retarded) I would have just stacked it myself. Banishing him from the home isn't going to get that wood stacked any faster.

Bride2Be Bride2Be:

brighter days

really honestly reminds me alot of my parents...when i lived at home. i really can understand ur situation and the stress u are under. its always an emotional roller coaster. some ones always got something to critis about you. its not fair or healthy for u. but you've got to pick and choose your battles [this was a battle that u were in the right to be upset about] but look at it this way, ur getting out. your parents are just being over protective and they are pushing you away, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. keep up your work here on tools and always search for brighter days=]

lunagolden lunagolden:

Wow! That's quite a load to bear

It is easy for most of us to tackle our challenges with the freedom we have to escape from the negativity and abuse that sometimes surrounds us - you, however, have one hell of a challenge, and you are in a place that is really really hard to deal with.  If you can, be proud of yourself for getting through this hardship - you are paying a high price for past actions, but you have decided to tackle the source - you! - and that is a great and empowering move.  Even if you dont want yourself to feel the sad and angry emotions, do let yourself feel the proud and happy ones (when they come :).

 

Stick with TFL, Mike sounds like a great guy, and soon this will all be an unhappy memory and you can better move forward towards a more empowering and supportive life.

 

Sending you positive vibes!!!!