Day 28

I stop to smell the flowers, maybe too much.  there was a time when I didnt stop. I worked so hard I did not take care of my relationships with my friends and family.  I did not take time to enjoy simpler things. Then, on May 16, 2006, I listened to a voice mail...my best friend had passed away at age 33. He woke up, kissed his wife, his 3 kids and started driving to work. less than 10 minutes away, he had a heart attack and died instantly while driving.

that experience still haunts me.  I have not fully accepted his death and i have not cried yet.  all this time has gone by and i still have not cried.  at some point, i know it will sink in and i will cry.  i really hope that point comes soon because i want to cry about a lot of things.

i miss my best friend.  but, the lesson i learned from his death is not to take my job or petty things seriously. if tom were alive, he would tell me exactly what i wanted to hear to help me get out of this rut. he would probably tell me "this is not permament. you can get through this..."

when he died, i made a mission to myself to enjoy the essentials of life. i promised that i would spend more time doing things that i will remember on my death bed. i decided to make my life about memories rather than career accomplishments.  this is probably a big part of why i am where I am right now in life.  the problem is, i have been enjoying life too much maybe, with no balance?

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