Last night I tried to run but my knee hurt, so I didn't even get a mile in.
I was frustrated and mad and upset, so my first inclination was to go buy a bag of Smarties to comfort myself: after all, if I could no longer run, who cares if I ate a bunch of candy, I might as well give in.
Talk about negative thinking, making a catastrophe out of one incident!
I'm usually really impulsive and once I have a thought in my head I do it, but I took a second and thought about what tools I could use (both from here and from BPDR).
I tried to "reverse engineer" the decision, thinking how I would feel after eating that whole bag of empty calories and sugar.
It was reallly difficult, because I kept trying to rationalise it by saying, "yeah, but it'll taste so good and feel so comforting that I don't CARE how I'll feel afterward."
But I focused on the physical nausea I'd probably have from eating so much sugar, and the guilt I would have from eating such crappy food and all the excess calories. I also told myself what a waste of time and gas it would be to go to the store.
I fought with myself the whole walk back from where I had to stop running, and I finally decided to just see how I felt when I got home (I couldn't make a firm decision to not go get the candy because it was such a big pull to me). Luckily by the time I got home, my attention had gone to other things and I totally forgot about the candy until thinking about it today.
I feel good about myself for how it turned out, even though I wasn't the most strong-willed I've ever been. But at least I tried instead of just giving in to impulsive thought and unhealthy behavior.
And the more I do this, the easier it'll be!
comments
says:
This is awesome. Keep going at it. And as you say the more you do it (using the reverse tool) the more natural it'll be and the more second nature it'll become. Just practice a bit and it'll get easier. Keep up the good work. You're really doing great, and you're really moving forward.
Take care,
Maria :)