Today tools was about Excuses. I came face to face and eye to eye with my excuses that I had seen as valid reasons before today for the most part. Now I see that was a case of mistaken identity.
I noticed a pattern of the majority of my excuses all originate from a recurring pattern of a few MAJOR ones. The major ones for me being:
PERFECTIONISM (in myself NOT AT ALL towards others. I am very patient, nonjudgmental and compassionate with others.)
PROCRASTINATION ( which I recognize even this one stems back to my perfectionism issue, it is ALL and BEST or nothing)
TIME which is unorganized, mismanaged and spread too thin which in turn leads to
ANXIETY and Feeling of being
OVERWHELMED.
First upon seeing them all written down I could easily not only see the pattern but had a sudden realization of how I ended up with these issues I have been struggling with all my life. I also had the revelation that they have been coping and survival skills in repeated situations of life and death or due to standards set FOR ME by others who meant WELL even from their own ill and confused minds at the time. However they do me no good whatsoever now and as a matter of fact, hold me back and down in life and keep me from reaching for my true potential.
It helped seeing these characteristics and excuses that have led to being an underachiever thus far.
First I went to Coping dot org and read all about perfectionism and its traits and damages and steps to overcome it, taking notes especially on the areas that are most like me.
Then I looked up inspiring, wise and encouraging quotes to read and write and use to retrain my brain from the distorted view to a new clear view of the TRUTH so I can liberate myself.
PERFECTIONISM
1. "For all the sad words, of tongue or pen, the saddest of these; it might have been." BY John Greenleaf Whittier
2. "Failure is not falling down. It is not getting up again." BY Mary Pickford
3. "You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are Doomed if you don't try!" BY unknown
4. "Perfectionism is not a quest for the best. It is a pursuit of the worst in ourselves, the part that tells us that nothing we do will everr be good enough - that we should try again." BY Julia Cameron
5. "You can make excuses or you can make money, but you can't do both." BY unknown
6. "A setback is a setup for a comeback." BY unknown
7. "Strive for perfection. Settle for Excellence." BY Don Shula
PROCRASTINATION
1. "Procrastination is opportunity's assassin." BY Victor Kiam
2. "Procrastination is one of the most common and deadlliest diseases and it's toll on success and happiness is heavy." BY Wayne Gretzky
3. "Procrastination is like a credit card: it is a lot of fun until you get the bill". BY Christopher Parker
4. "Procrastination is the fear of success. People procrastinate because they are afraid of success that they know will result if they move ahead now. Because success is heavy, carries a responsibility with it, it is much easier to procrastinate and live on the "Someday I'll" philosophy of life. BY Denis Waitley
5. "Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone." BY Pablo Picasso
PROCRASTINATION and TIME MANAGEMENT
1. "It's not the hours you put into your work that counts, it's the work you put in the hours. " BY Sam Ewing
2. "The butterfly counts not months but moments and has time enough." BY Sam Ewing
3. Yesterday is already a dream and tomorrow is only a vision; but today, well lived, makes every yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a vision of hope." FROM the Sanskrit
4. "Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have and only YOU can determine how it will be spent. Be careful, lest you let others spend it for you." BY Carl Sandburg
5. "Life is just a minute. Only sixy seconds in it. Forces upon you, can't refuse it. Didn't seek it, didn't choose it. But it's up to you to use it. You will suffer if you lose it. Give an account if you abuse it. Just a tiny little minute. But Eternity is in it." BY Unknown
WORRY, ANXIETY
1. "Worry is the misuse of your imagination - thinking about what you don't want to happen. Happiness is thinkning about the desired end result. "BY Ed Foreman
2. "Worry is a darkroom where NEGATIVES are developed." BY Unknown
I wrote these in my ALL ABOUT ME notebook as visual and mental reminders to help me retrain my brain in the opposite direction of my excuses.
No one can do better than their own personal best at any given time. Personal best... is good ENOUGH.
I believe the more I win the stare down with my excuses... the easier and more enjoyable it will be to LOOK MYSELF in the EYES.
PS. Note my eyes in the pic are also LOOKING UP... because I KNOW the more I conquer these excuses the more looking up I will be doing right along with my life.
comments
ttl
have no fear Symmentry Couch will be covering each of these areas in ttl. The advantage you have, is you actually have seen your areas of challenge before you cover them! Good job to YOU!
Way to Go
Wow! You are so perceptive and helpful to the rest of us!
"Life is just a minute. Only sixy seconds in it. Forces upon you, can't refuse it. Didn't seek it, didn't choose it. But it's up to you to use it. You will suffer if you lose it. Give an account if you abuse it. Just a tiny little minute. But Eternity is in it." BY Unknown
This is my favourite quote of the list but I plan to print them all out...thanks so much for sharing. You are such a deep and insightful person. This program is a gift to us all but when someone comes along who works so hard at it, we all benefit.
I want to send you a huge hug.
This is GREAT!
Wow, you are doing amazing. I really like your insights. I too have suffered from perfectionism - definitely not towards others, but directed towards myself.
I too have had anxiety and procrastination. I have found that it's from my fear of success.
Your quotes are GREAT. I'm going to print these and really focus on what each one says. I like Denis Waitely's quote.
"Procrastination is the fear of success. People procrastinate because they are afraid of success that they know will result if they move ahead now. Because success is heavy, carries a responsibility with it, it is much easier to procrastinate and live on the "Someday I'll" philosophy of life. BY Denis Waitley
Yikes - after reading this I don't want to fear success. I'm definitely working on this and mamarou is right, Coach does go over these topics.
You are doing great though. Self awareness and the willingness to counquer these are definitely key towards overcoming this.
You can do it and WOW you are such an inspiration for us all. You are also a WONDERFUL contributer to this community. We are all very blessed to have you here.
THANK YOU!!
Your friend,
Mosaic Moon
You have such wonderful insights
You have such wonderful insights and are making great strides.
I also have an "it is ALL and BEST or nothing" habit. It takes me way longer then it should to do things because I don't want to make any "mistakes". And, things can pile up because I don't want to tackle them until I can fix _everything_ all at once and make things perfect.
The following quote resonates very strongly with me:
"Perfectionism is not a quest for the best. It is a pursuit of the worst in ourselves, the part that tells us that nothing we do will everr be good enough - that we should try again." BY Julia Cameron
Thank you for sharing!
Thanks
Loved the quotes. They're just great.
I also suffer from perfectionism, procrastination, and anxiety. Funny thing is I've still managed to be pretty darn successful despite myself. When I get out of my own way, let go of my ego, and appreciate what is, life is good.
Best,
Kayla